FACTS ABOUT LOVE
Love is deeper than what you have been reading in books. Love is quite different from what Hollywood is preaching, love put God first and it is selfless. Many homes today are based on sexual feeling and infatuation that is why marriages are ending in divorce while former love-birds are living in the same house as sworn- enemies. True love is sensible, it is matured, it is enduring and glorious. Base your marriage on it; it is a sure foundation, base your destiny on it; it is a solid rock.
FACT I
SEXUAL FEELINGS DO NOT EQUATE LOVE. Most people think sexual feelings equate to love, but it does not. Sexual feeling like any other feeling passes away either satisfied or not; if your life is based on it, then your life goes away with it.
The rate of divorce is very high in America and some parts of Europe today because most of their so-call love are based on sex, not true love.
The fact that two people have sexual feelings toward each other does not mean they are in love, sexual attraction can come at first sight, but love develops gradually. YOU CAN NOT LOVE SOMEBODY YOU DO NOT KNOW, BUT YOU CAN BE SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO ANYBODY.
However feeling or desire for sex does not always indicate that you are truly in love, neither does it mean a need for immediate fulfilment.
Many times sexual feeling may be very intense, but it does not always last and on its own alone cannot lead to a meaningful marriage relationship, you may not be able to stop this feeling from coming but you can decide not to act on it. Sexual feeling is not sin, it is what you do with it that may become sin.
FACT II
TRUE LOVE OBEYS GOD AND WILL NOT BREAK GOD’S COMMANDMENT
Most singles ignore God and their church leaders because they think they are in love. Anything that makes you disobey your parent and your church leaders is not love.
FACT III
COUPLES THAT YOU SEE AROUND BEATING EACH OTHER TODAY ONCE CLAIMED TO BE DEEPLY AND MADLY IN LOVE.
We see a lot of bad marriages around us today but one thing that surprises me is that there is none of these couples that did not claim to be in love before they got married. But soon after the honeymoon, the truth is revealed; they’ve never been in love. Many of them were only infatuated or were lustful, and neither of these can stand the test of time.
FACT IV
LOVE AFFAIRS IN ROMANCE BOOKS, MAGAZINES AND MOVIES ARE NOT GENUINE LOVE.
True love is not found in Nollywood, Hollywood plays, M & B, Hints, Hearts, Hot Romance or Better lover magazines. True and genuine love is in the Bible, if you base your love-life on what you read or watch in these books; magazines and films, you are not doing yourself any favour. Ask publishers of these books and magazines, how many of them are having good homes? Very few! How many Nollywood and Hollywood stars are happily married?
FACT V
REAL LOVE IS MORE THAN A BEAUTIFUL FEELING.
Real love is a commitment; it is more than a beautiful feeling. A commitment is a choice which is backed with actions. God commanded Husbands to love their wives (Eph. 5:25), He did not command them to have romantic feelings toward them, but to be committed to them.
That you are having a beautiful feeling towards someone does not mean you are in love, it might be infatuation.
The best way to know whether your ‘romance’ is real love or infatuation is through the test of time. Infatuations always start fast, great and hot, there are a lot of “highs” but it will soon come to an end with bitterness, hurt and regret trailing it. Real love, on the other hand, starts slowly, usually it is just friendship at first, but the friendship grows and one day you discover your heart has grown together. Somebody said, “true love is a situation where two hearts are beating as one, in total submission to God”. That is the truth.
True love grows with the passing of time, but infatuation will fade, hence time is the best test of love. That is why it is always advisable to have at least 12 months of courtship before marriage.
If you check Carol’s story in chapter one and relate it to what you have read in chapter two, you will discover that Caro is not having a true love but she was infatuated for one reason or the other. People find it difficult to differentiate between love and infatuation as I said at the beginning of this chapter, that is the reason we are going to devote the next chapter to it.
FACT VI
ANYBODY THAT LOVES YOU WILL NEVER WANT TO HURT YOU.
Anybody that have a genuine love towards you will not want anything that will hurt you or your feelings; hence he/she will never want sex before marriage, because he/she knows that, it may hinder your progress in life.
FACT VII
THERE IS ALWAYS A HUGE PRICE TO PAY FOR EVERY PRE-MARITAL SEX.
FACT VIII
THERE IS NO SAFE DANGER, NO SAFE SIN, NO SAFE SEX.
FACT IX
“IF YOU LOVE ME DO IT WITH ME”, IS THE VOICE OF YOUR WORST ENEMY.
FACT X
THE ONLY SAFE SEX IS TO AVOID SEX UNTIL YOU MARRY. LUST BRING SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE, ANY SEX OUTSIDE MARRIAGE IS NOT BASED ON LOVE.
