HANDLING NAGGING IN MARRIAGE

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HANDLING NAGGING IN MARRIAGE
Bisi Adewale

“It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman”.
Proverbs 21:9,19

What is nagging? To nag means to complain, murmur, condemn or criticize continually. It also means to be continually troublesome.
It is a negative communication style. (Eph. 4:29)
it is a major killer of marriage; and
It is a toxic communication that can sink any marriage, relationship and family life.
“He that covereth a transgression seeketh love, but he that repeateth a matter nags separate very friends” Proverbs 17:9
It is a low level of communication.

Why People Nag?
Immaturity and ignorance of the right way to communicate.
Impatience. People who want things done at their own speed do resort to nagging
Perception that we would not get what we want from the other person except we keep asking
Perfectionist Spirit. People who want things done in their own way do end up nagging.
Prayerlessness. It is shocking but true; if you are the prayerful and discipline type, you won’t nag.
Who Nag in Marriage?
Both men and women do nag, but women are more prone to nagging

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Effect of Nagging on Marriage
It generates anger Proverbs 15:1
It hardly yields result we expect
It leads to criticism and condemnation
It makes the home difficult for spouse that is been nagged
It breaks friendship. (Proverbs 17:9)
It destroys love and affection
It removes romance from marriage as it lead to hatred.
It encourages moving from one crises to another
God is not glorified in your nagging
It can lead to divorce (Proverbs 17:9)

Handling Nagging Spouse
Pray for him/her
Be patience with him or her.
Study together about effective communication.
Sit down to talk about it, most nagging spouse may not even know that they nag, they always think that they are just making request
Always address your spouse request with deep and effective communication such that if it cannot be done now, you can easily agree on it
Let your spouse know how you do feel when he/she nags.

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