HOW TO SAY NO TO SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE
Bisi Adewale
Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. Hebrews 13-4 KJV
When two people are in love, there will be an emotional attraction which may lead to sexual temptation if not managed properly.
Sexual temptation is one of the major challenges in courtship because of our human nature.
Courtship is not a period of intercourse, it’s for interview. It’s not for sexual experiment or exploration.
Sex before the wedding is a major destroyer of the purpose of courtship and marriage foundation.
Sex in courtship will deprive you of the growth of your relationship and the opportunity of knowing your fiancé/fiancée.
Many people have fallen into premarital sex not because they plan to have sex but because they don’t know how to avoid its temptation.
To avoid falling for sexual temptation, get acquainted with these points:
- Believe you can court without having sex. A lot of people believe that it is impossible for two people to be in love without having sex.
- Avoid being alone with the opposite sex in the room: Being alone often puts emotions in control.
- Let your discussions be in the open.
- Note that love in courtship is not expressed through sex.
- Take a Joseph flight. When your voice is getting low and your mood is changing, leave. When every other person leaves the room for both of you, leave.
- Watch out for sex baits: kissing, hugging, holding of hands, lapping, hair admiration, lying down on his/her bed, changing clothes in his house, spoon feeding each other, watching romantic films or discussing intimate topics such as sexual urge. Sexual enjoyment can trigger your sexual response.
- Avoid cohabitation: Don’t live together for any reason.
- Make a vow towards purity: Vow not to have sex before your wedding night. A vow like this will keep you in check even if your emotion is running riot.
- Avoid seductive dressing and sitting positions: Avoid wearing clothes that are too tight and revealing. Your curves, breast, pants or shape of your butt should be covered properly, especially when you are going to meet your spouse-to-be. Guys should not wear boxers or clothes that reveal their chest or muscles. Be decent always in your dressing.
- Avoid idle moments together: Spending 24 hours together doing nothing will open the devil’s workshop for you.
- Engage in spiritual exercises like fasting, praying, studying the Bible and other Christian books together. Go to programs and retreats together. Gal. 5:16, Rom 8;5
- Avoid long-term courtship.
- Beware of family visitation traps and night parties.
- Have you messed up before? Don’t just repent, confess and turn away from it in order to be free from guilt. Prov. 24:16
© Bisi Adewale 2020
