Counselling

HOW TO RELATE WITH YOUR MOTHER IN-LAW TO BE WHILE IN COURTSHIP WITH HER SON

March 13, 2020

2062

HOW TO RELATE WITH YOUR MOTHER IN-LAW TO BE WHILE IN COURTSHIP WITH HER SON

By Bisi Adewale

Many a time, wives find themselves at the mercy of their mother inlaws. In fact, many wives have lost their homes because of them while some other wives have become second class citizens or second wives in their own homes. Why? Mama usually assumes or arrogates to herself the role of the first wife.

As a single lady this is the best period to create a good relationship with your future in-laws, especially your prospective mother-in-law. If you really want to have a successful marital life, you must do the following:

GET RID OF THE NOTION THAT MOTHERS-IN-LAW ARE BAD. Anticipate a very wonderful relationship with your in-laws and do not create obstacles in your mind.
BEFORE AND DURING COURTSHIP. Pray for your potential mother-in-law. Pray for her favour, support, love and understanding. As you are seeking the face of God for a blissful home, start to pray for your in-laws. Do not allow the devil to use them against you.
COMPORT YOURSELF. Carefully handle your in-laws and don’t be too forward or quiet. Be wise.
BE HARDWORKING; especially when you are visiting them. They will be watching you.
BE HUMBLE and submissive
FLEE FROM SEXUAL SINS DURING COURTSHIP; preserve your integrity.
INSIST ON RIGHTEOUSNESS, even if they suggest pre-marital pregnancy. Remember it is ungodly and unscriptural.
FEEL AND ACT FREELY with your in-law to-be.
SEND GIFTS TO YOUR MOTHER-in-law to-be.
THINK POSITIVELY AND NEVER HATE any of your intending in-laws because it is dangerous.
TRY TO WIN THE LOVE of your potential mother-in-law, even if she is displaying resentment towards you or your engagement to her son.
START TO SEE YOUR WOULD-BE MOTHER-IN-LAW as your biological mother even if she is behaving otherwise.
MAKE SURE YOU GET ALL NECESSARY INFORMATION about your would-be in-laws from your intending partner and use them to pray and act positively toward them. Some of the things to know are:
Their custom or culture. If you are an Ibo lady (Eastern Nigeria) wishing to marry a Yoruba man (Western Nigeria), you must learn how to kneel down to greet your parents-in-law and even your husband because that is their custom, else they will see you as being disrespectful and proud.
Their Local Food.Know how to prepare and eat it.
Their Beliefs.Any of their belief that is scriptural should be respected, while those unscriptural should be wisely rejected. (This applies to custom/ culture too).
Trust the Lord for a blissful home.
VISIT ALL NECESSARY FAMILY MEMBERS before your wedding (For more on this, kindly get copies of my book Wives Versus Mothers-in-law, When will the Battle Cease? For yourself, your mother-in-law (as a gift) and your would-be husband).