ARE YOU READY FOR MARRIAGE?
By Bisi Adewale
Every youth have this desire in their mind that they will one day get married and have a home of their own. But man has failed in doing the needful that will birth the desires of their heart. That’s why am asking you now, are you ready for marriage?
Take a deep thought and ponder on these below to see if you are ready.
- Your Preparation (Proverbs 16:1). Your preparation will also determine your marital destiny. The question is, how prepared are you for marriage? Are you just preparing for the wedding? Most people spend the majority of their time preparing for the wedding without spending enough time to prepare for their marriage. This is totally wrong. If you want a blissful home, prepare physically, materially, socially, financially, spiritually, morally, emotionally and intellectually for marriage. Failure to prepare is a preparation for failure. Read marriage books, listen to tapes, attend seminars, attend pre-marital training and marriage school.
- Prepare your mind to leave your parents and cleave to your spouse.Genesis 2:24
- Prepare to love your wife and serve her. Ephesians 5:25
- Prepare to submit to your husband, respect and obey him. Eph. 5:22,33
- Prepare to be a solid father and mother.
- Prepare to succeed in marriage.
- Who you are. Most people fail to ascertain who they are before getting married. Emphasis is usually on getting married to the best person. To get a good home, you need to change who you are, if you are not the best you should be.Check yourcharacter, habit, communication skill, relational, capacity, etc. All these must be re-trained if they are not okay because that is the only way you can make the most of your home. After all, your character is your marriage.
- Who are you getting married to?Of course, who your spouse is will also have a great effect on your marriage. If you marry an unbeliever, a backslider, a drunk, an occultic person, a cultist, etc you are not likely going to find it easy in that marriage. If you get married without any considerations for the future of your marriage but base your outlook choice on the outlook of the person without considering his/her character and relationship with God, you will definitely regret it.
- What you and your partner carry. People carry different pieces of baggage unknown to them. Some carry good things like blessing, anointing, divine blessing, godly seed of covenant peace and joy while some people carry ancestral curses, evil covenants, evil patterns, parental curses, the spirit of failure, etc. Look closely at your relationship and prayerful deal with any negative thing you and your partner are carrying in the place of prayer and deliverance. You will find it difficult to prosper in life and marriage if any of you is a carrier of evil.
- What you do.Your job, the job of your spouse and how you can balance them with your family life will also determine the success and otherwise of your marriage. If you make your job your number one priority, thereby abandoning God and your spouse in the process, it will have a negative effect on your relationship, marriage and family life. Your number one priority should be God, your spouse, your children, then your job. Please, set your priorities right.
- How you think.The state of your mind will end up being the state of your marriage. Your mental attitude will determine your marriage altitude. Many people have the wrong conception about marriage, opposite sex, love, parenting, in-laws, sex, etc. Many people believe marriage is not to be enjoyed. Some men say “Women are necessary evil”. “The place of a woman is at the foot of her husband”. “Women are good for nothing but for food, sex and baby-making.” Some women also believe “Mothers-in-law are bad”, “All men are liars and not to be trusted”, “Men are terrible people”, etc. These kinds of thoughts are bad and they will determine your attitude towards your spouse which in turn will destroy your marriage if you don’t deal with them now.
- The company you keep. “He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed”. (Proverbs 13:20). If you keep company with people with good values for marriage and family life, it will show in your attitude and marriage. If you do anything otherwise, it will also show in your family lives. Who are your friends? What are their values? What is their relationship with God and other families like? You are not likely going to rise above the company you keep and people you hang out with.
- Your readiness to serve.Most people get married looking for somebody who will serve them. One of the most difficult marriages is the marriage of two care-hunters. They end up hurting each other. For your marriage to be the best you and your spouse dreamt of, you and your spouse must grow up to be caregivers and not care-hunters. Rise to serve each other and don’t see marriage as a 50/50 situation of serve-me-I-serve-you. Give your service hundred per cent as unto the Lord and see God turning your marriage around for good.
God bless you!
© Bisi Adewale 2020
