Contemporary Enemies of Marriage – Bisi Adewale
No time has marriage been under attack than our present time, the rate of divorce is alarming even among the ministers of God who are supposed to be good examples to the people they are leading. Many marriages are in crisis, children are becoming delinquent, rate of family abandonment among men is high, child a abuse is now a common thing all over the world, marriage is becoming a by-word in civilized economy and subject of a cruel joke in many societies. We are full of quotable quote that reveal the level of our thinking and wrong mental attitude about marriage and family life. Quote like “marriage is like wine it is not properly judge until the second glass” or ” marriage is the only war in which we sleep with the enemy.” And many more like them shows problem we have in marriage in our contemporary days.
Here, I will be exposing to you many things that are contemporary enemies of marriage, with suggested solution, so that you may learn how to handle them in your own marriage.
1. “Meism” – One of the most difficult enemies of modern marriage is self-centeredness, which I prefer to call “meism”, “This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, un-thankful, unholy”,
There is no time this scripture is truer than now, people are just lover of themselves than lover of God or their spouses. I, me, mine and myself, with many people given to self-glorification, self-justification, self -knowledge.
Selfishness is known to be at the center of difficult marriages we are witnessing worldwide, because a good marriage is “we” not “me”, it is about giving not about receiving, but modern people definition of love, marriage and relationship is about themselves not about their partner, everybody try to get marry to the person that can serve them best, not people they can serve better, result is; we have two service hunters joined together In matrimony ,result is always about ACRIMONY AND AGONY Not MATRIMONY
Solution: know that marriage is not just about you, it is about service, about serving your spouse. So go ahead serve your mate, serve your partner, be a giver, be a lover, pour water on each others hands, IF YOU ARE TOO BIG TO SERVE ,YOU ARE TOO SMALL TO BE IN MARRIAGE.
2. Electronic Media- television and radio informs and make us to be aware of our environment, but with the level of immoral films and music on our airwaves today, many have been asking whether television is a blessing or curse to the institution of marriage, many of this films mis-inform people about love, relationship, sex and marriage.
Television is also known to be a very good thief of intimacy in marriage, many people spend about six hours watching television daily, having no time to blend and bond with their mates, but getting wrong information from actors and actress and films producers who are mostly divorced, adulterous or in turbulent marriages.
Solution: Don’t submit your marriage to television and radio, don’t allow the remote-control to control your life and marriage, watching television should not be every time of your waking life, regulate it, go for news and specific programs avoid watching television wholesale be choosy. Love your marriage more than the “tube”.
3. WRONG MODELS. Another problem television, films and magazine has brought into marriage is the issue of wrong models, people tend to choose those they see on television as their life, family and marriage role- model either the person is doing well is his or her family life or not. Most of our so called celebrity are not having it cool in their marriages, most are separated from their spouses, many are neck deep in crisis and scandals, while so many have children outside wedlock, some are also single parent, while many of them are co-habitating, living together without marriage. If you make people like this your marriage role model, you are likely going to end up like them.
Solution: choose your role models wisely; make godly couples in good marriage your mentor.
4. Moral value eroding: erosion of moral value is another enemy of marriage. People are careless now about keeping their marriage vows, marriage covenant means nothing to many people, and they break it at willed- filling the bed, breaking the edge over their homes.
Solution: keep to your marriage vow, don’t break it, don’t ever allow adultery in your marriage, keep your bed pure. Sleep only with your wife, women are not sweeter than each other unless if you are covetous, ungodly and immoral, enjoyment that is in sex is just 8 seconds and can be less, will you destroy your beautiful life because of 8 seconds enjoyment? Please don’t do it, get the best from your wife and husband don’t destroy your marriage and your life.
Bisi Adewale is a family expert and president of college of marital success; He is an international conference speaker and an author of more than 52 books on marriage and family life, singles, love, sex and purity and intimacy. For more info visit www.familybooster.com, www.bisiadewale.com, or call 08068312004, or send mail to familybooster@gmail.com
