16 SIMPLE WAYS TO HANDLE CONFLICTS IN MARRIAGE
Bisi Adewale
“The beginning of strife is like releasing water, therefore stop contention before a quarrel starts” (Prov. 17:1; Prov. 18:17-20, Prov. 17:9-11, Matt. 18:15-17)
Conflicts occur in every relationship especially in intimate ones such as marriage. Happy couples also disagree; they experience conflicts in their marriages. They argue, quarrel and get irritated over issues.
But unlike many distressed couples, they make positive and constructive use of conflict; they do not allow their conflict to turn to war. They focus on how best to solve the problem instead of tearing each other apart.
16 SIMPLE WAYS TO HANDLE CONFLICTS IN MARRIAGE
- Learn how to handle disagreement. When one party is hot; the other party should be cold.
- Never seek to win all arguments
- Be positive
- Identify the problem and decide to solve it peacefully
- Express your feelings in love, do not bottle-up. Talk to your spouse.
- Never attack your spouse over an issue unless he is in a relaxed mood, then talk about the issue.
- Avoid using pronouns like. “I”, “Mine”, “Myself”, “Me,” say “We”, “Us”, “Our”, See any mistake as a joint mistake. You may even blame yourself for it, and always attribute glory of success to your spouse.
- State how you feel, without blaming.
- Identify the solution.
- Choose the right time
- Use the right tone and speak with wisdom-Never speak harshly, never shout. Speak with love and respect.
- Never be too big to apologize (1 pet 5:5)
- Above all, be prayerful and be genuinely converted.
- Study the Bible and remain in Christ. (1 Thess. 5:17; Col 3:16)
- Meet a counsellor or your pastor. (Prov. 15:22; Prov. 12:15)
- See any mistake as a joint mistake. You may even blame yourself for it, and always attribute glory of success to your spouse.
© Bisi Adewale 2020
