5 PECULIARITIES OF MARRIAGE
5 PECULIARITIES OF MARRIAGE
By Bisi Adewale
Marriage is totally different from any other human relationship. This difference must be understood if we must make a success out of our marital life.
- Marriage and Friendship.
Marriage is quite different from any ordinary friendship. Friendship is a choice that encourages an entrance and exit system. You can go into it when and how you like and you can do away with it as you like. You may find yourself in a friendship because of your environment, job, problem, success etc. Marriage, on its own, is deeper than friendship. We go into it in the presence of all members of our family, church and friends. It is a permanent relationship that must be sustained till death parts you both. Sex is allowed in marriage but it is disallowed in friendship. Marriage is deeper than any other human relationship. No friendship should be allowed to destroy your marriage.
- Marriage and Courtship
Courtship is a period between when a lady agrees to marry a man and the time they eventually marry. It is a period of planning, learning, praying and preparing for marriage. It is not a marriage but a time to get to know the one you wants to marry. Courtship should not involve living together, washing or cooking for the brother or sexual intercourse. On the other hand, marriage involves staying together, having sex, bearing child and raising them etc.
- Marriage and Co-habitation.
Cohabitation is a kind of relationship where a lady moves in to live with a man with or without any marriage plan but without any official wedding ceremony. These days people call it “trial marriage”, “live-in-lover” etc. Cohabitation is wrong and ungodly. No God-fearing lady will allow herself to be cheaply used. No wise man, who knows what he is doing, will be involved in this ungodly act. Marriage is quite different from cohabitation. Married couples are living together legally; staying-together to fulfill the plan and will of God for their marriages.
- Marriage and Partnership
Marriage is quite different from business partnership and differs from any partnership. In a business partnership, anything can bring the relationship to an end but marriage is a life-time partnership that only death could bring to an end. Most partnerships are on the basis of give and take i.e. 50/50 input but marriage is giving 100% giving. Oneness is partnership emanates out of interest for money but marriage originates from interest in each other.
- Marriage and Relations.
Our relations are people with whom we are related by blood (birth) but our marriage partners are the people to whom we are related by covenant. We do not choose our relations but we decide our spouses. But one funny thing about marriage is that your marriage partner comes before any member of your family. Hence, husbands and wives become number one in each other’s life according to the divine arrangement. In fact, they have to leave their parents to have successful unions. After marriage, your siblings cease to be the principal people in your life; your spouse takes their place. Hence, making our relations our next-of-kin is wrong; our next-of-kin should be our spouses.
