5 Major Areas Of Transparency In Marriage
-By Bisi Adewale
There are many areas where a couple should make sure they are transparent to each other if they desire a stronger and better marriage.
Family transparency. A couple should be transparent in the way they relate with their individual families. Given secret supports to your family without the knowledge of your spouse will totally break the trust between you if he gets to know. Handle your respective family in love, openness and transparency. Don’t allow your family to come between you. You are not even permitted to love your family more than your spouse; your spouse comes first after God in your life.2. Phone transparency. This is another area where modern couples fail to be transparent. Spouses hide their phones from each other. In some extreme cases they take their phones with them when they go to the toilet and bathroom or put a pass word so that their spouses cannot access them. Besides, some spouse cannot receive calls while his partner is there. He walks away, saying “hello, hello; network is bad” just to walk away from where the spouse can hear him. And he will deliberately not pick some calls in the presence of his spouse. If you have nothing to hide, why do you hide your phone from your spouse, make or receive calls secretly? If there is no skeleton in your cupboard why take the phone with you to the bath room, or restrict access to it? 5 Major Areas Of Transparency In Marriage 5 Major Areas Of Transparency In Marriage 5 Major Areas Of Transparency In Marriage
3. Mail transparency. Many spouses can never allow their partners to have access to their mails. Again, if you have nothing to hide, you don’t need to hide your e-mail details from your spouse. There is no e-mail address that I have that my wife cannot access. Sometimes I even instruct her to check or send mails to people. Remember, both of you must first be NAKED, so that you won’t be ashamed.4. Friendship transparency. No other relationship must be stronger or better than the one with your spouse. Your relationship with your husband or wife comes first in everything you do, others follow. Your spouse has the right to know what transpire between you and anybody you call your friend. Note that if you are a married man your close friends or people you call “friends” should be men like you not ladies. Likewise friends of married women should be ladies not men. Otherwise, trust and transparency are endangered, bringing in fear and suspicion. 5 Major Areas Of Transparency In Marriage 5 Major Areas Of Transparency In Marriage 5 Major Areas Of Transparency In Marriage5. Financial transparency. If there is an area a couple finds more difficult than any other is financial transparency. A spouse who hides his financial details from his partner values money more than the partner. You are not transparent if your wife does not know how much you earn as salary and details of other incomes. You need to be open to each other about how much is coming in and how it is spent. Let your spouse know your debts, obligations, fees, bills, rents, rates and fares to be paid and when to pay them, your expected income and how you plan to spend it, the project you have now and how you plan to finance it.
EASY WAYS TO TRANSPARENCY IN MARRIAGE
A good marriage demands transparency and this comes through trust. Trust does not come through prayer and fasting. Here we want to check the best way to become transparent in your marriage.
– Spend time together: Spending time together will make you to know more about each other. Trust becomes stronger as you interact closely. And as love increases your marriage becomes better.
– Effective communication: Spend time together to engage in effective communication. This reinforces transparency as you talk as friends, lovers and partners. To have effective communication, you must open your heart as you talk not just your mouth. Talk openly, deeply, truthfully, joyfully, fearlessly, continuously, totally respectfully and romantically. Communication of this nature works for a better marriage.
– Speak the truth: I need to emphasize that truth is the foundation of transparency. So say what you mean and mean what you say. Don’t ever tell your spouse lies. It destroys trust, transparency and hurts marriage relationship deeply. If you lie once when you tell the truth later your spouse may not take you serious.
– Be faithful and let your spouse know you do. Don’t ever give room for sexual immorality and don’t allow your spouse to think you are not faithful, so do everything to be open to your spouse. Don’t spend any unaccountable time with the opposite sex; don’t be closer to any opposite sex than your mate.
– Your spouse has the right to know the kind of relationship you have with any opposite sex that is close to you and for what reason.
– Avoid pornography like a plague. Your spouse will never trust you if he knows you are hook on pornography.
- Pray together with your spouse always: Praying together builds love and friendship and make you to be more open to each other, making your marriage better and stronger.
Pastor Bisi Adewale is a family and relationship expert; author of Secret of Irresistible Wife and more than 70 other books on marriage and family life. You can reach him on familybooster@gmail.com, 08068312004, Whatsaap 08051512823, BB: 2AF5C883, Blog: www.bisiadewale.com, facebook.com/PastorBisiAdewale.Twitter @bisiadewale
