COLOURS OF MARRIAGE
Bisi Adewale
“Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair; thou hast doves’ eyes. Behold, thou art fair, my beloved, yea, pleasant: also our bed is green. The beams of our house are cedar, and our rafters of fir”. Song 1:15-17
1. BLACK MARRIAGE: This is the marriage of unbelievers, people who do not know the Lord, whose marriage is not based on Biblical principles but on worldly philosophy and human understanding. This marriage is always full of strife, demonstration of flesh and negative habits and character. “The way of the wicked is as darkness: they know not at what they stumble”. Proverbs 4:19.
2. YELLOW MARRIAGE: This is a marriage at “drifting level”. It was once full of love, intimacy, acceptance, romance and joy. Due to carelessness or busyness of the couples involved, they begin to neglect each other, taking each other for granted, remove courtesy, honour and respect, spends less and less time together. “Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love. Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent”. Rev 2:4-5
3. ORANGE MARRIAGE: Marriage at this level has grown beyond “yellow” It grows deeper into “matrimonial dillusion”. At this stage, it is not just about “drifting” from each other, it is about “hurting” each other. The marriage now involve outburst of anger, hatred, bickering, fighting, peace today; fight tomorrow, hurting each other with words, etc.
4. RED MARRIAGE: (Proverbs 19:13-14). This is a bleeding marriage; it has gone beyond drifting and hurting to bleeding.
WHAT IS LACKING IN A RED MARRIAGE
A red marriage is a terrible marriage. A marriage devoid of love, joy, care, affection, attention, communication and passion.
WHAT IS AVAILABLE IN A RED MARRIAGE
It is full of total war, violence, all-out-battle, malice, cutting remarks, abusive words and murderous thoughts. A red marriage is a marriage at its worst. Some couples at this stage, Proverbs 21:19
5. PINK MARRIAGE: This is the kind of marriage where the woman is in charge; ruling and reigning over the husband. In this kind of marriage, competition, rivalry, power struggle and in-fighting is the order of the day; making life difficult for everybody. The order of God is for the husband to be the head of the home and the wife submit to him. 1 Cor. 11:3, 8-9.
6. ASH MARRIAGE: This is the kind of home where the man is the head and the headache of the family. He is very harsh, wicked and difficult. Nobody can advise him, nobody can talk to him or influence him, he is just difficult, dictatorial and hard .
“Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun.” Eccl 9:9
7. BROWN MARRIAGE: A brown marriage is a marriage with a brown bed. A bed full of immoralities, infidelity and uncleanliness. “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge”. Hebrews 13:4.
8. BLUE MARRIAGE: A blue marriage is a love-filled marriage, a marriage full of intimacy, bonding, care, attention, affection and passion. A blue kind of marriage is God’s idea of marriage, a place of peace and the presence of God. SOS 4:7-10
9. WHITE MARRIAGE: A white marriage is a marriage of righteousness.
A marriage whose foundation is on Christ.
They are controlled by the Holy Spirit. Their home is based on biblical principles. In a white marriage, God is the final authority. Kindness is their attitude, holiness is the standard, love is their language, joy is their music.
For your marriage to be a great marriage it must be white, it must be blue. Psalm 127:1
10. GREEN MARRIAGE: This is a growing marriage.
AREAS OF GROWTH
— A marriage that is growing daily towards God,
— Growing towards partner
— growing in love, intimacy, acceptance and wisdom.
For your home to be all right and your marriage okay; it must be a growing marriage,a green marriage. As soon as your marriage stops growing; it will degenerate.
SOS 1:15-17
Pastor Bisi Adewale is a family and relationship expert; author of Secret of Irresistible Wife and more than 70 other books on marriage and family life. You can reach him on familybooster@gmail.com, 08068312004, Whatsaap 08051512823, BB: 2AF5C883, Blog: www.bisiadewale.com, facebook.com/PastorBisiAdewale.Twitter @bisiadewale
