Understanding a Stressed Man
Understanding a stressed man can be difficult because he doesn’t express his issues as easily and openly as a woman does. Many women don’t even realize that a man is stressed because he hides it so well or expresses it in ways that aren’t necessarily telling of his stress.
When dealing with a man who is under a lot of stress, you must understand what stress means to him. Understanding a Stressed Man Understanding a Stressed Man
What Stress Means to a Man
- It’s a sign of weakness
Stress is a weakness and many men will refuse to show that they can’t handle something. Many men don’t want people to think they are being challenged or feel overwhelmed. This is why whenever you ask a man if he needs help with something; he will decline even if he could benefit from some assistance. Understanding a Stressed Man
- ”’It fuels productivity”
From another perspective, some men thrive on stress. It’s what fuels them to be productive and solve problems. Some men crave it and seek it out if life is going too smoothly for them.
How Men Deal with Stress
Men deal with stress in many different ways, but one thing is for sure, they do it in a way that doesn’t openly tell others they are having trouble. The following are some ways that men handle their stress: Understanding a Stressed Man Understanding a Stressed Man
- Isolates himself
Some men will stay away from others as much as possible so they don’t have to deal with any other problems and no one will know they are stressed.
- Avoids situations
Avoiding particular situations so that they aren’t stressed is another way that a man deals with stress. Understanding a Stressed Man Understanding a Stressed Man
- Increases physical activity
He may start to exercise more, play sports or do another type of physical activity to release some of the built-up tension he feels.
- Becomes angry
He may anger easily and disrespect the people around him. This anger could lead to bigger issues such as physical or verbal attack.
- Blames others
Some people will blame others for problems in attempt to place the stress they feel on other people.
- Masks stress by creating problems
This may sound counterproductive but some men will actually create problems so they don’t have to face the stress they feel from issues they already have. Since stress is a form of lack of control over something, creating a problem will help give them that sense of control back.
How to Help a Stressed Man
Now that you understand a stressed man, you may wonder how to help him. While you may know what you would like when you are stressed, assisting a man with his stress is much different. Remember, men don’t want you to know they are stressed and they surely don’t want you to think they need help, which means you have to work around that.
Sneak Attack on the Stress
If you can identify what stresses out the man, attempt to help the problem without him knowing. For example, your husband becomes angry when he can’t find important paperwork so you buy him a file cabinet and organize his papers for him. Or, if you know he doesn’t have time for lunch because he is busy working all day, help him beat stress by either delivering him a lunch or packing one that he can eat while working.
Communicate You Are Available to Talk
Some men won’t voluntarily talk about what is bothering them because they would rather not think about it but sometimes they will talk about it if asked. Try to bring up the subject in an unthreatening way such as while you are having dinner or taking a leisurely walk one evening. You can say, “I’ve noticed that you’ve seemed preoccupied lately, is there anything out of the ordinary happening at work?”
Encourage Stress Relievers Undercover
Without tell him that he is stressed so he needs to do this or that, offer suggestions of things he can do that would reduce stress. You can discuss planning a vacation, encourage him to play a sport, exercise, or plan to meet for lunch sometimes as a nice break from the office.
Don’t Add Stress to His Life
If you know he isn’t having an easy time at work or other area in his life, don’t add to it by placing more demands on him. Wait until he seems as though he not so overwhelmed, and then approach him with the issues you would like to address with him.
Final Thought on Stressed Men
Remember that understanding a stressed man means taking a different perspective than your own. You must see stress through the eyes of a man and know what he feels and thinks about it. Once you do this, you will finally understand why he does and says the things he does when he’s stressed out.
-By Marcelina Hardy, MSEd, BCC
Source:stress.lovetoknow.com
