Sanctuary Marriage: Understanding the Concept of Sanctuary Marriage


Sanctuary Marriage: Understanding the Concept of Sanctuary Marriage
– Bisi Adewale
{SOS 2:4-14, Eccl. 9:9}
A sanctuary marriage is an intimate marriage, a marriage of friends and lovers, a marriage of openness, closeness, fondness and oneness.
A marriage that is full of love, honour, glamour and the presence of God. To call it another name; it is an INTIMATE MARRIAGE.
Note these:
• Living together as husband and wife without intimacy produces- PLASTIC MARRIAGE
• Marriage without intimate discussion produces- ACIDIC MARRIAGE (A Marriage full of misunderstanding, argument, suspicion, strife and quarrels).
• Marriage without intimate time-out produces- MARRIED CO-TENANTS and HOSTEL HOMES.
• Sex without intimacy produces- BIOLOGICAL MATING or atimes MARITAL RAPE.
a. Separated Level – They have separated totally and now live in different places. Though not officially divorce but still come together once in a while because of their children
b. O-Y-O (On-your-own) Level- They are still together in the same house, but not in the same room, knows close to nothing about each other, can keep malice for months, nothing concern them about each other , full of bitterness, hatred and resentment. Both have records of “evil deeds” of their partners. This kind of marriage produces “Olympic couples”; it is full of competition, in-fighting, vengeance and strife. A lot of Christian are on this level, they only refuse to separate because of the church, society or children and nobody is doing anything to improve their marriage
c. Togetherness Level- (Courtyard Level) – Couples are not really fighting at this level but they are not friends. They do things together; most especially if it involves their children’s health, food, etc. Marriages at this level are plastic marriages.
d. Fondness Level (Inner Level)- Couples at this level are closer than couples at togetherness level, they talk freely about anything in the house, they celebrate each other to a large extent, they are friends and are fond of each other, but they are not lovers.
e. Oneness Level (Sanctuary Level) – At this level, couples are not just friends, they are lovers, they are not just familiar, they are family. They are not just close; they are one, they don’t only joined their hands, their minds are also joined.
They are open, mutual, tender, caring and selfless to each other. They live their life based on
Galatians 5:22-23, they settled disputes and talk intimately. SOS 8:7.
Make your husband a prayer project; never give him a breathing space in the place of prayer.
Bisi Adewale is a family expert and president of college of marital success, He is an international conference speaker and an author of more than 52 books on marriage and family life, singles, love, sex and purity and intimacy. He is the host of family T.V. program called Family Booster Moments.


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