-By Bisi Adewale
How most husbands correct their wives in marriage has done more harm than good in their relationship with their wives.
Many of them speak harshly on top of their voice which make their wives harbor anger and bitterness against them.
This piece will open your eyes to the right way of correcting your wife without hurting her.
1) Don’t Shout On Her: Don’t shout on her, she is not your house maid, she is not a Child. You can correct, yes, but why shouting?
2) Correct In Love: Correcting should be done in love, if done in any other way it turns to criticism and condemnation
3) Avoid Criticisms: Stop criticizing her, rather correct in love. Most will say it’s constructive criticism, true? It means disapproval by pointing out errors and mistakes.
Correction is the act of offering better options to mistakes.
Correction and criticism are never the same.
Husband A says: what manner of food is this? is this pop corn or fried Rice? how I wish I marry a more sensible wife, with better home training, who can cook better
Husband B says: Sweet heart this rice is too salty and dry unlike the one you did yesterday. I think salt should be reduced any other time because of our health.
Husband A criticized, Husband B, corrected his wife in love. Stop criticizing your wife.
4) Appreciate Her When She Is Right: It will be wrong to correct when it’s not well done, when you don’t praise when it’s well done. Form the habit of praising and appreciating your wife for good deeds.
5) Avoid Correcting Her In The Presence Of Your Children: Incessant correction of your wife before your Children will make them to disrespect her.
6) Avoid Correcting Her In The Public: Avoid correcting your wife in the public, it does not show you as a gentle man, and will affect her self-esteem.
7) Don’t Correct Her While You Are Angry: Stop correcting your wife in anger, shouting, ranting, beating and making trouble. Real men don’t do that.
8) Avoid Comparison: In your thought of correcting her, you might have been comparing her with other women. “Don’t you see what your friend is doing?”
“Can’t you learn from our neighbors wife?”
“I think you should borrow a leaf from deaconess so and so”
This is very wrong, no woman love to be compared with others, stop it.
9) Don’t Refer To Old Issues: Avoid referring to issues discussed and settled,stick to the present issue,discuss like adults and move on.
10) Avoid Attacking Her Womanhood: And you call yourself a woman? Virtuous women don’t behave like this, you better change before I change you.
This is very wrong, don’t do it.
11) Avoid Attacking Her Dignity: You don’t behave like someone with sense, do you think at all? And you said you went to school, I doubt it. This is very wrong, you too, you are not talking like somebody that pass through a college.
12) Correct Her In Time Of Peace: Most husband do want to correct in the heat of anger, at the height of misunderstanding, when temper has already hit the roof. That is not the best time to correct, it will yield little or no result.
13) Help In Doing House chores: The best way to correct is to lead by example, step into the kitchen to give a helping hand, don’t just sit in the front of the Television correcting what goes on in the kitchen. Wives are doing great job, appreciate yours and support her to be a better wife and mother