5 VITAL DECISIONS EVERY SINGLE MUST TAKE TO HAVE A BLISSFUL MARRIAGE
-By Oba Samuel
The life of every living creature is characterized with so many decisions. However, these decisions can be zero down to three major ones: namely: who to serve, what to do and who to marry.5 VITAL DECISIONS EVERY SINGLE MUST TAKE TO HAVE A BLISSFUL MARRIAGE
After taking the decision of who to marry, there are often decisions to take about your marriage that will help you to have a blissful marriage. These decisions are so vital, it is better to take them while you are still single in order to have a formidable foundation to build on in marriage.5 VITAL DECISIONS EVERY SINGLE MUST TAKE TO HAVE A BLISSFUL MARRIAGE
- DECISION TO BE A HUSBAND: it’s quite unfortunate that many guys enter into marriage without knowing what it entails to be a husband. To be a real husband, you have to make a decision to be a quality husband. The decision to be a quality husband is different from the decision to be married. This is unknown to many guys, that is why we have a lot of married boys in marriage. The decision to be a husband involves making up your mind to be “housebound” i.e. saying bye to hanging out with the boys and becoming homely. Also, prepare to relate with new born baby, get ready to shoulder responsibilities, treat your wife with love and honour and be prepared to be a protector – i.e. protect your wife from external aggression. Prepare to be a provider. One of the hallmarks of a great husband is provision.5 VITAL DECISIONS EVERY SINGLE MUST TAKE TO HAVE A BLISSFUL MARRIAGE
- DECISION TO BE A WIFE: very many girls were getting married without making the decision to be a wife. Becoming a wife is not accidental; you have to be deliberate about it. What you don’t plan for, you can’t become. Make a decision to be submissive to your husband regardless of his height, age, academic qualification and financial status. Power struggle must not be an issue in your marriage if all you want is a blissful marriage. Decision to be a wife also involves making up your mind to cook for your husband. You must not hate the kitchen. Eating outside should not be in practice in your matrimonial home because he that feeds a man, owns his heart. Cook for your husband no matter how busy you are. A real wife is homely. So make a decision not to take jobs that will not give you sufficient time for your husband and children. Being a wife also involves the ability to take care of new born babies. You can learn this from nursing mothers around you. Make a decision to be a resources manager, don’t be extravagant.
- DECISION TO BE SELFLESS: it is not natural to be selfless. Selfishness is inside every human being. If your marriage must be successful, you have to take decision to be selfless and consciously work towards it. During courtship, we focus our attention and resources on the other party but not soon as we get wedded; the giver often becomes the receiver. Most married men and women start living self-focus life, instead of partner-focus life. Self-attitude creates “me empire” meanwhile, intimacy-filled marriage is “we garden”. Stop living solo life, start thinking “we”.5 VITAL DECISIONS EVERY SINGLE MUST TAKE TO HAVE A BLISSFUL MARRIAGE
- DECISION TO MARRY ONCE AND STAY MARRIED: for any marriage to succeed and for a marriage to break, it starts from the mind. Don’t just take decision to get married, rather take decision to marry once and stay married. Marriage is full of unanticipated changes, challenges and unmet expectations. No marriage is free from misunderstanding, adjustment and gender differences. And at times, financial challenges, in-laws, career and sexual challenges. All these and more can pose a very big danger to a marriage but you have to make up your mind not to call it quit in your marriage. Don’t be a divorce hunterbecause of seemingly difficult issues in your marriage but be a solution hunter. Never mingle with people who will give you negative information about your marriage. Make up your mind to always resolve your differences and conflicts. Demonstrate willingness to change, accept your spouse, connect and reconnect. Getting married is good, staying married is better while being happily married is the best. Work towards it. Yes you can!
- 5. DECISION TO SERVE: marriage is not a place to be served; it’s a place to serve. The danger is; many people are planning for marriage with the intention of being served. Before you walk down the aisle, make a decision to do what is necessary to make your marriage flourish. Do what will make your partner feel loved even if it affects your personal comfort. Serve your partner and don’t wait to be served. Mutual service is the mother of healthy marriage. Have you made up your mind to serve? If no, cancel your wedding plans!