MATURITY AND MARRIAGE
That we henceforth be no more children tossed to and fro carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive. But speaking the truth in love may grow up into Him in all things who is the head even Christ Eph. 4:14-15. Heb. 5:12-14, Eph, 4:14-16, 1 Cor. 13:11.
Maturity and Marriage-Maturity defines a period of definite growth. It is at this point animals can reproduce their kinds and plants become fruitful. In human beings, it marks a time of deep positive emotional, moral and, of course spiritual development which enhances a meaningful life. The result of this development is evident in the quality of behaviour and character of the individual human being. Where this kind of development is yet to fully take shape like, for instance, teenage time, marriages between such young people suffer a great set back. In fact ,recent Statistics have shown that a marriage between two teenagers has about sixty five percent possibility of breaking up within the first three years. Hence, maturity before marriage should be carefully considered.
- Marriage is not for boys and girls. It is for men and women.( Genesis 2:24-25.)
- Only mature men can make marriage work.
- Marriage is for somebody who is legally recognized as an adult.
- It takes mature person to accept responsibility.
- It takes mature person to be totally free from parents.
- Immaturity leads to marriage break up.
TYPES OF MATURITY
Maturity is not simply based on age or physical appearance; it involves a lot of things, namely:
- Physical maturity. Anybody that wants to get marry must NOT be a teenager. He must be mature physically. Marriage is neither a crèche nor a day care; it is a place of work and responsibility. Based on information gotten from counseling people, we recommend the following ages:
- The woman to be at least 21 years
- The man to be at least 25 years
- Financially maturity.
- The couple must be willing to work and provide for the family.
- There must be regular income.
- There must be prudence.
- Spiritual Maturity
- The couple must be born again.
- They must be filled with Holy Ghost.
- They must understand God’s principles on marriage as they relate to leadership, love, parenting, submission, contentment, commitment, faithfulness, responsibilities, oneness and so on (Genesis 2:24-25, Matt. 19:4-6).
- They must pass the test in 2 Peter 1:5-9.
- They must submit to quality prayer life.
- The couple must likewise love the Bible.
- They must be steadfastly working for God.
- They must regularly spend quality time with God in Bible study.
- Social Maturity. The couple must strengthen their ability to make and keep friends, willingness to say “I am sorry” when wrong, and to commend, appreciate, and praise. They must be readily willing to change and adjust where necessary.
- Sexual Maturity.
- The couple must be willing to keep to one’s sex partner.
- They must be able to control their sexual drive and banish lust from their hearts.
- Emotional /Psychological Maturity.
- The couple must develop the gracious ability to handle anger and put pride under their foot.
- They must be able to handle fear and appropriately direct joy, love and handle jealous.
- Their daily existence must be characterized by boldness, faith, courage, tolerance, forbearance, meekness and so on.
- They must regularly enhance their ability to manage stress or crisis.
- They must be dogged in time of test and trial, never submitting to defeat.
- They must be willing to suffer shame for the sake of the truth.