32 WAYS TO TEST TRUE LOVE (A must read for single guys & ladies)-PT2

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THE FOUR PHASES OF LOVE
THE FOUR PHASES OF LOVE

32 WAYS TO TEST TRUE LOVE (A must read for single guys & ladies)-PT2

32 WAYS TO TEST TRUE LOVE (A must read for single guys & ladies)-PT2

true love

This article is the continuation of part-1 of same topic. To get the part-1 kindly check for it under Relationship category. Thanks for following.

TEST 17 – Patience test -Is that fellow ready to wait till the wedding night before sex? True love waits; it is patient, while lust and infatuation want sex now. If a guy tells you that all he wants now is sex, he is not in love with you he is a sex hunter, flee from him.

TEST 18- Peace test – Do you have peace of mind in that relationship? Or does it take away your joy and all you now have is fear, guilt, sorrow and regret? It means the relationship is not based on true love. Lust normally produces that but love brings joy and gladness. Test that love, with your peace of mind. If peace is far from it, God is not in it and love is far from it.

TEST 19 -Other relationship test -In Infatuation, your whole world revolves round the other person. Other relationship do not seem important to you, you tend to neglect your family and friends, -your partner becomes the most important to you, whatever happens to others does not really matter, you think you are justified for this “Angel” of yours. Most infatuation do not last long like I told you, in real love, your beloved is the most important person in the world to you but that will not affect your relationship with your friend and family; they are equally important to you.

Test 20 – Truth test – Are you ready to tell the whole truth to your partner or you find it difficult to expose your past to him/her. True love is not afraid to tell the truth, but lust and infatuation have a lot to hide. So, if you are still hiding behind one “finger” you are not likely in true love.

Test 21People’s test – How do others view your relationship? What other people think about your “beloved” is very important.

If everybody around you most especially your friends, parent and pastor disagree with your choice, you better watch it.

READ ALSO:  THE AGONY OF LOVE-Episode 1

 

In Infatuation, you do not see fault because you are “blindly in love” but people around you are not “blind together with you. If all of them disagree with you, but you persist despite glaring faults, it shows you are only being infatuated and not in true love.

To have God’s blessing on your marriage it is very important to have your pastor’s consent and your parent’s approval before you go into marriage.

Test 22 -Distance test – Distance kills infatuation easily but in true love there is always unity in diversity as out of sight is not out of mind.

In infatuation, when the person goes away at first; you will still be “hot within” for him or her but as time goes on, somebody very close to you becomes more appealing more than letters and photograph of your lover.

In real love absence makes your heart grow, fond of the one you love, real love do survive the distance test.

Test 23 – Time test – Infatuation and lust always starts very hot, but with time, it becomes hot today, cold tomorrow until finally it grows totally cold.

Real love do survive test of time because it is deeply rooted before it started, it is rooted in the other person’s total personalty and not just the physical appearance, hence; the more they know of each other, the more the love grows. Check your love affair, do you still maintain the hotness of the beginning or you only love each other when you are fornicating? Check it, if that guy that used to come almost everyday now finds it difficult to see you for a whole month, fail to call or never pick your calls, it only shows that he is not in love and he has seen it all, it is time to go.

Test 24 – Pluralistic test – In infatuation and lust, you tend to think of yourself first. When talking about your activities; the words commonly used are- “I”, “Me”, “You”, “My”, “Mine”, “He”, “His” and “Hers”. In Real love, the words commonly used are- “we”, “our” and “us”|. You see yourself as a unit not as a distinct personality.

Infatuation and lust are always selfish while real love is always selfless, it thinks of the other party first and builds a “global-departmental” fellowship. This is very important for a future marriage.

READ ALSO:  MARRIAGE IS BEYOND THE ALTAR

Test 25- Goal test – Is it your goal to find the person who will love you, care for you, cook for you, provide for you, protect you, devote to you and make you happy? If that is your reason for going into that relationship, you are not in love, it is infatuation. If your desire is to get somebody to kiss, caress, fondle and sleep with is infatuation. True love is ready to give, even if it hurts, it is unselfish, committed, you want to do all you can to make the other party happy as far as he want in the fear of God, that is true love. If all what your partner want is to collect from you or have sex with you, he or she is not in love.

Test 26- Maturity test- Teenagers are not ripe enough for love affairs; they can only be infatuated, how old, are you? If you are still a teenager you are likely deceiving yourself, if the person you are going out with is a teenager, he or she is not in a genuine love but infatuated. True love can only come from matured, regenerated and unselfish mind.

Test 27 – Protocol test – Is your love ready to obey your church leaders and abide by the protocol of the church or you feel you are too much in love to be corrected or directed by your church leaders?

True love is obedient and submissive to constituted authority; infatuation and lust have no regard for anybody.

Test 28- Prayer test – Do you feel like praying together or praying for each other or you are always excited with love to the extent that you feel that prayer is not necessary.

True love puts God first and is not afraid to go before him in prayer.

The person you are in love with, is he a lover of prayer and the word of God? If not, it is dangerous to marry such a person.

Test 29-Character test – How is the character of your lover? Is he a drunkard, a smoker or a flirt? Does he/she put God first in everything? Does he believe in pure courtship? Have you ever found him fighting on the street, or you discover that he is a cultist and indulge in examination malpractices or embezzlement of company’s money? If he is not of a good character and you know all these and you pretend as if you do not see, it shows that you are only being infatuated but not in real love. Real love is based on godly character and integrity. If you discover your partner is not having godly nature, you better make a U-Turn. It is better now.

READ ALSO:  THE AGONY OF LOVE-Episode 36

Test 30 – Friends test -Who are the friends of your partner, are they believers? If they are not, you are about to sell yourself cheaply into the hand of a wolf that will devour you. Look at his friends, if they drink, smoke and womanise then you are just deceiving yourself.

Test 31 – Thought test – How is your thought about your “beloved”? Do you always have a dirty thought about him or her? A “stinking thinking” is lust. Thought of sexual intercourse only shows that it is not real love.

Real love does have a pure thought towards the other party.

Test 32- God’s voice test – What does God say concerning this relationship? Is God leading you into it or you are going into it without considering God’s view about it? “As many as are being led by the spirit of God are the sons of God” (Rom 8:14).

If God is not leading you into that relationship you are living dangerously by going into it.

Real love hear God’s voice and obeys it, infatuation and lust disdain the voice of God.

Note: Use these tests to examine whether you are in genuine love, then use it to test whether your so-called lover truly loves you.

 

32 WAYS TO TEST TRUE LOVE (A must read for single guys & ladies)-PT2

Pastor Bisi Adewale is a family and relationship expert; author of Secret of Irresistible Wife and more than 70 other books on marriage and family life. You can reach him on familybooster@gmail.com, 08068312004, 08051512823, BB: 2AF5C883, Blog:  www.bisiadewale.com, Website:www.familybooster.com facebook.com/PastorBisiAdewale.Twitter@bisiadewale

32 WAYS TO TEST TRUE LOVE (A must read for single guys & ladies)-PT2