HOW TO HANDLE OUR EXPECTATIONS IN MARRIAGE

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HOW TO HANDLE OUR EXPECTATIONS IN MARRIAGE

By Bisi Adewale
When you walked down the aisle, what were your hopes and dreams regarding your spouse and your future life together? More than likely, you were optimistic and believed that your marriage would be a happy one.

To handle your expectation, there is a need for you to consider the followings

1.      Positive Construction. Develop good and positive expectations which can be met by your mate, bearing in mind that he/she is human, hence, cannot meet all your expectations.

2.      Communication. Let your mate know what you desire and how you desire them. Never bottle up your desire, communicate it effectively and listen to your spouse too to know his/her expectations. Use this list as a lead to your discussion

Finances

Sex

Spiritual activities

Roles and responsibilities at home

In-laws and relatives

Character, attitude and habits.

Parenting

Friendship

Food and water

Future

Housing

Dressing

Mentorship

Household chores

Car

Respect

Family growth

Holiday

Recreation

Sport

Hobby

Politics
Job and career

Romance

Outlook

Relationship

Children

Domestic support

Health and personal hygiene, etc.
Pick them one after the other and discuss them deeply. Bear in mind that, it is a continuous process. Never get tired of talking about your expectations because the success of your marriage depends on them.

  1. Compromise- Be ready to have “full cake”, “half cake”, and “no cake at all” as the case may be. Don’t insist, don’t be rigid, don’t give room for deadlock in your marriage, be ready to lose. Let your marriage win, make it a win-win situation If you keep on insisting on your right; you may win the argument but you will lose a partner, please compromise.
  2. Contentment. Avoid comparing notes with your friends. Your situation is different. Be content with what God has given to you; walk in His light and give glory to God.

Thanks and God Bless you.